What is this?

Right.

So I suppose I should begin with an introduction. David Copperfield style? I was born, I grew up? I guess we can do that. I was born in the state I reside in, a mid-sized Midwest state called Michigan. Don't let it's hand-warming, childhood memory recollection shape fool you. Michigan is a harsh land in which paying bills on time is a fleeting dream, and making ends meet is a puzzle of rubik's cube-esque intensity. I also grew up in this bizarre land of sledding and failed automakers. 

But that's not really what this exercise in self-indulgence is all about. I'm mainly doing this as a therapy technique. A small experiment to see if telling everyone who chooses to read all about my everyday existence will help out with a startlingly huge lack of an ability to plan for my future.

So, forgive my rampant narcissism, it may very well be necessary. I'll do my best to be entertaining while doing this all.

So... What to expect. I find that expectations that are not met can be the biggest deal breaker in life, so maybe laying out a few ground rules will be helpful in keeping any readership that I establish. 

We'll just do a bullet-point list of stuff that probably will occur neh?

• Regularity of posts: I'm unpredictable and unreliable. Not the best person to be starting a blog I know. I slack off, I forget things, and I lose interest more often than Hollywood starlets forget proper undergarments. But I'll give you my word I will try to keep this thing updated. How often I manage to do that remains to be seen, but we'll shoot for at least once a week ok? I think I can keep on top of that. No guarantees that I won't spam this thing 4 or 5 times in a day though...

• Profanity: I'm a profane boy in a conservative-founded nation. I swear. I make up entertaining insults. I'm in love with similes and metaphors that are PG-13 to R rated. Dirty jokes make up the majority of my flirtation techniques. But I will try to refrain from making this a Kevin Smith film. No such restrictions on your comments. You say whatever you fucking like. ^^;

• Types of Posts: Now usually a blog has a theme. Like... "I'm off at college, see my drama" or "I work in industry A, feel the excitement/pain/jesus what is the raptor doing here of my cubicle existence." Not so here. I don't doubt a lot of this will be an exercise of internet social masturbation/voyeurism as I ejaculate my life's entertaining stories for you all to see/judge/advise me on, but some of it might just be tidbits I find entertaining, or technical blurbs that I write to let you all know about/remind myself to look up later. Consider this more of an online notebook that is left open at a company front desk. I'm the attendant who writes down all types of random crap in it, and you're all visitors and employees who get to garner whatever you want from my digressions. 

• Layout and Setup: You probably recognize Blogger's standard old template. That's what I'm dealing with right now. As a tech geek (We'll get into me later), I hope to use this as a testing ground/training tool to get up on my web design. No idea how it'll end up, but it'll change over time.

Well... that's what... 4 little things? Lets start with those, and you all can let me know what else you want addressed. 

I'm not going to go to much into me, because hopefully I'll put all that along in the sidebar to the... what... Left of this post? I think its the left. If not, by George I'll make a sidebar on the left so that I'm not lying to you.

Oh! That's something.

• Honesty: Everything here will be the truth as I see it. What's that mean? It means I'm not going to jerk you around, or tell falsehoods. If I'm talking about something that's happened, I'm going to relate it how I saw it happening. Some of you might know me personally... shoot, some of you might be discussed in this. I'm apologizing in advance if this makes you feel slighted. Feel free to say so to me, via comment, email, phone, or a swift smack to the face when we next meet. (Please let me know why you hit me in the last case, lest I walk around terrified that its national "Smack Homeless" day.) That being said, I will practice "Blogomission". Blogomission is my word for the intentional leaving out of information in a public forum, such as names of parties, places, and things, editing out of confidential details, and other things of that nature. I'll let you know when I'm omitting, [Besides the names of people, who shall be referred to by cute monikers such as "Running Guy" or "Intoxicated Girl Homeless Likes (probably abbr. to IGHL)"] as well as giving a reason for the omission. 

So... Now we get to the meat of this. I'll answer two of my own questions, as well as open a small forum for you all, and then wrap this first post up.

"What's this blog about?": Again, I'm mainly making this as a therapy session to help me deal with a lot that's going on in my life. Hopefully it can grow into more than that, perhaps a method for you all to stay in contact with me, a way for me to meet people, maybe even a way for everyone to learn a little something I find on my internet excursions.  I don't really know yet, but that's why it's an experiment.

"What's the name about?": Homeless in MI might cause some concern. We'll address it right now. I'm not currently "Homeless" by the traditional definition. I have an apartment, I'm not being evicted (Yet. Let's work on keeping it that way too!), and I sleep in a relatively comfy bed each night. I eat when I can, I work when I stop procrastinating (like... after I finish this blog post!), and I try to pay the bills. I even shower regularly, Hooray for hygiene. So don't WORRY about me starving, or sleeping in a bag on a bench. Not happening anytime soon if I can at all avoid it. Instead the name is more of... a theory. An idea so to speak. I consider myself to have an apartment, a place of residence, but I no longer have a "Home." There isn't a place in Michigan where my metaphorical Heart resides, where I can "Hang up my Kangol" and put my feet up. I don't have that warm fuzzy place that makes me bright and shiny at the end of the day. So this blog is really about my pursuit of finding out how I can find that place again, in or out of Michigan. I hope you like the adventure. ^.- \/

And finally, my ASK Homeless section. No, it's not dear Abby. Well... I guess you can use it as such, but seeing as my life is topsy-turvy at all times, I don't know if I'd take my own advice. I see it more as a "What the hell do you mean by blah"... where "blah" is what you want to know about me, life, whatever. If you ask me a question in a comment, I'll do my best to answer it properly, or at the very least honestly, in my next post that isn't just a LFHP (Linked for Her Pleasure) post.

I think that's going to be it. I need to try to figure out how to get this public internet access point to work for me so I can get work done... so I can get paid and such.

I promise a post tomorrow, or maybe even tonight, to elaborate on what situations got to me to where I am, and where I'm going to try to go to from here. We'll call it Homeless History, or some other nonsense. 

Take care of yourselves. 

~Homeless